Duhh Moments...

Duhh Moment #1



Few nights ago, our gang was having our usual dinner/supper at the usual mamak. Nothing unusual. Then, amidst the noise of people talking (some were as loud as election campaigners on halers), girlish screams came from the direction of a 'nasi lemak' booth next to the us. Immediately after, all the Indon girls manning the booth lurched out, shrieking outloud, and hurling away their spatulas (Spongebob would not have approved of this), showing panic faces (the girls, not the spatulas). Then we saw the unusual.



Fire has spread high up to the booth's ceiling, cathing on the easily burned 'nasi lemak' paraphernelias- plastic fork and spoon, paper wraps, banana leave wrappers, plastic bags. Right before it reaches the pot containing fried anchovies, the wind blew the fire to another direction. And all this happened in less than 10 seconds. Then only we realized the danger of sitting so close to the fire. From where I was seated, I can't see where the fire started from, but a few little blow-ups later coupled with the emanating intoxicating odour; the reality hit us- there's a gas leak!



Bart quickly grabbed my hand, and we started running away from the scene. The other mamak-goers also started to pick-up their bags and ran into random directions. In that moment of chaos, I remember seeing some idiots who actually went closer to the blazing fire while ignorantly lighting up their cigarettes. Talk about some people's deathwish.



Among the three of us, Tapir was the first to reach the car. Then, with our heart beating like how it does after 45minutes of RPM class, we stood from afar, watching and waiting expectedly for an explosion,...well, honestly, what we really wanted to see then was which one of those smoking idiots will catch on the fire first.



And then we sort of realized.."Hey, doesn't the valves on cooking gas cylinders allow for a one-way flow only?" So high unlikely that when it leaks, the whole thing will blow up like what you see in the movies.



Duhh,..no explosion ala Hollywood tonite. And since the mamaks managed to put out the fire and the odour has since dissipated, there won't be few less idiots in this world either. Major letdown. But thank God the anchovies were safe.

Duhh moment #2

How many lawyers does it take to figure out which one is Hall 2 at GSC?

Obviously, from our experience last weekend - it takes more than 3. Hahahaha!!!

Yup, the three of us decided that we should dump our brain for one day and watch a feel good chick flick that doesn't require us to think one bit. Little did we know that we actually left our brains at home earlier on.

The sign outside the cinema hall states:-

[ Hall 1]

[<---Seat 1-9 Seat 10-18---->] .... Or sumthing like that.

We were allocated with seats 13, 14 & 15 in Hall 1. I swear to God there was no Hall 2 sign on the right door that we went into (or are we suffering from acute myopia of some sort?). And I am thankful to God that all of us had enough common sense to check our movie tickets again at the back of the hall after seeing that our seat was occupied by a couple of burly guys. I am even more glad that we sought the assistance of the staff to chase those burly guys out of our seat, or otherwise we wouldn've have known that we were supposed to go through the LEFT DOOR that says "seat 1-9" as, despite the obvious mathematical incongruence, WALLA!- it will and it does lead us to our seats 13, 14 & 15.

Well, duhhh babes!!! Some things in life will remain a mystery. No wonder when we went into the wrong hall, a full blown gun-shooting showdown was showing on-screen. Duhhhh!!

Why Facebook Is for Old Fogies

I came across this article today. In my case, it is quite true to a certain extent. Old fog pun old fog lah.... mengaku je lah.

Hahaha...
___________________________________________________

Why Facebook Is for Old Fogies

Illustration by John Cuneo for TIME

Facebook is five. Maybe you didn't get it in your news feed, but it was in February 2004 that Harvard student Mark Zuckerberg, along with some classmates, launched the social network that ate the world. Did he realize back then in his dorm that he was witnessing merely the larval stage of his creation? For what began with college students has found its fullest, richest expression with us, the middle-aged. Here are 10 reasons Facebook is for old fogies:

1. Facebook is about finding people you've lost track of. And, son, we've lost track of more people than you've ever met. Remember who you went to prom with junior year? See, we don't. We've gone through multiple schools, jobs and marriages. Each one of those came with a complete cast of characters, most of whom we have forgotten existed. But Facebook never forgets.

2. We're no longer bitter about high school. You're probably still hung up on any number of petty slights, but when that person who used to call us that thing we're not going to mention here, because it really stuck, asks us to be friends on Facebook, we happily friend that person. Because we're all grown up now. We're bigger than that. Or some of us are, anyway. We're in therapy, and it's going really well. These are just broad generalizations. Next reason.


3. We never get drunk at parties and get photographed holding beer bottles in suggestive positions. We wish we still did that. But we don't.



4. Facebook isn't just a social network; it's a business network. And unlike, say, college students, we actually have jobs. What's the point of networking with people who can't hire you? Not that we'd want to work with anyone your age anyway. Given the recession — and the amount of time we spend on Facebook — a bunch of hungry, motivated young guns is the last thing we need around here.


5. We're lazy. We have jobs and children and houses and substance-abuse problems to deal with. At our age, we don't want to do anything. What we want is to hear about other people doing things and then judge them for it. Which is what news feeds are for.


6. We're old enough that pictures from grade school or summer camp look nothing like us. These days, the only way to identify us is with Facebook tags.



7. We have children. There is very little that old people enjoy more than forcing others to pay attention to pictures of their children. Facebook is the most efficient engine ever devised for this.


8. We're too old to remember e-mail addresses. You have to understand: we have spent decades drinking diet soda out of aluminum cans. That stuff catches up with you. We can't remember friends' e-mail addresses. We can barely remember their names.


9. We don't understand Twitter. Literally. It makes no sense to us.


10. We're not cool, and we don't care. There was a time when it was cool to be on Facebook. That time has passed. Facebook now has 150 million members, and its fastest-growing demographic is 30 and up. At this point, it's way cooler not to be on Facebook. We've ruined it for good, just like we ruined Twilight and skateboarding. So git! And while you're at it, you damn kids better get off our lawn too.

Myristica Garden Villa - For Sale

We have made up my mind - we are going to sell the house.... We had some people viewing it yesterday, and pray to God, they will make the offer soon. In the meantime, it is still open for viewing.

T

The house is sheltered in a Green Street Concept at Precint 6, Setia Alam, Shah Alam; a gated community most would love to own a home in. The Myristica Garden Villa (34' x 75') is a specially designed linked Semi-D with each cluster interconnected on the ground floor's yard area. The design allows direct ventilation and natural lighting with a large living and dining area right at your doorstep. It has a floor height of 11ft for ground floor and 10ft for the upper floor. Space is further enhanced by an open dry kitchen to the dining room. The 24ft wide-frontage car porch is refined with textured concrete. Our unit is next to the corner lot and 50 metres away from the 24-hr duty security guard post. We received the key in Feb 2008. And no one has lived in there.

T

The house has 4+1 rooms and 3 baths with a built-up area from 2,679 sq.ft on freehold land. Buyers are entitled to free maintenance and security for the first 2 years. It is also worthy to note that Myristica was built in an environment-friendly development, i.e. the Green Street Concept with concealed underground cables and broadband access.

The house faces a small hill few hundred metres away, separated by a huge moat. Almost everyday around 11am, a brood of jungle fowls will make their way down from the hill to the small pond below the hill to quench their thirst. Every evening, the billowing breeze brings out the feeling of being in a relaxing private retreat.

We are direct owners of the property, and the price is negotiable. Feel free to contact me or leave your contact info at this blog if you are interested. Direct buyers are most welcomed.

I Put What?! On My Face?

Location: Beauty supplies shop, Sg Wang Plaza, Jalan Bukit Bintang, KL.


Auntie: Yes, can I 'hepchu' (help you)?

Me: Yeah. Auntie, I want to try out a new shampoo. Can you recommend a good one for me?

Auntie: (after analyzing my dry hair) Sure! Why don't you try this one? This one 'vely''(very) good one. It's imported from Amelika (America). Very guuuuud (good) for dry and damaged hair..

Me: But Auntie...

Auntie: Please aa...you can call me Glace (while handing out her business card. It actually reads 'Grace')

Me: Okay Glace, I mean ...Grace. But Grace, my hair is not damaged. It's only dry.

Grace who was formerly known as 'Auntie': Haiyaahhh...see, dry meaning its damaged 'lah'. Actually aa, I see your skin also needs help. See, got 'black, black' (I think she was referring to my spots). Sayang (dear), you know, You must take care of your skin (as if!). I have this cream, vely (very) good for your 'black, black'.

Me: But Grace, I am looking for shampoo, not face cream!

Grace: You want shampoo you take this one 'lah' (shoving 4 bottles of hair care stuff into my arms). but this face cream you have to try also. I see you wear a lot of 'pancake' (?!). Haiyah,..don't wear pancake, it 'bites'(she gets scarier now) into your skin, making it dry.

Me: 'Pancake'? You mean compact powder?

Grace: Yes 'lah', the powder like the cake that one (excuse her *Manglish).

Me: Don't want 'lah'. No thanks. I like my 'pancake' better. I'll just take these stuff (a.k.a. the shampoo, etc. Those stuff later set me back RM250!)

Moral of the story: Never lose control eventhough people say you look like you put 'pancake' (of all things!) onto your face. Your patience maybe your saving Grace. You are as beautiful as you think you are.


*Manglish = 'Malaysian English'.

Access Denied?!

Access Denied (policy_denied)

Your system policy has denied access to the requested URL (www.facebook.com).

For assistance, contact your network support team.


....Excellent. Now what am I supposed to do in the office?....*&%@#

For The Fallen Soldier...

Around this time every year, an especially cheerful birthday card usually arrives, wishing me another year of happiness and joy.

But since last year, I kept reminding myself that the card will not be here.

A truly caring person, he touched the lives of people around him in his own special way. The last I spoke to him was years ago, but still, the routine birthday and Hari Raya cards never fail to show up at my doorstep every year.

Everything happens for a reason. And I believe his was simply because God loves him more.

Al-fatihah and may you rest in peace.

My name...is Hygieia

20 Things I Didn't Know About ... Hygiene

Gee, I didn't know that dirty hands killed a U.S. president...

1. Hygiene comes from the name "Hygieia," the Greek goddess of health, cleanliness and ... the Moon. Ancient Greek gods apparently worked double shifts.
2. The human body is home to some 1,000 species of bacteria. There are more germs on your body than people in the United States.
3. "Not tonight dear, I just washed my hands": Anti-bacterial soap is no more effective at preventing infection than regular soap, and triclosan (the active ingredient) can mess with your sex hormones.
4. Save the germs! A study of over 11,000 children determined that an overly hygienic environment increases the risk of eczema and asthma.
5. Monks of the Jain Dharma (a minority religion in India) are forbidden to bathe any part of their bodies besides the hands and feet, believing the act of bathing might jeopardize the lives of millions of microorganisms.
6. It's a good thing they're monks.
7. Soap gets its name from the mythological Mount Sapo. According to legend, fat and wood ash from animal sacrifices there washed into the Tiber River, creating a rudimentary cleaning agent that aided women doing their washing.
8. Ancient Egyptians and Aztecs rubbed urine on their skin to treat cuts and burns. Urea, a key chemical in urine, is known to kill fungi and bacteria.
9. In a small victory for cleanliness, England's medieval king Henry IV required his knights to bathe at least once in their lives -- during their ritual knighthood ceremonies.
10. That's their excuse, anyway: Excrement dumped out of windows into the streets in 18th-century London contaminated the city's water supply and forced locals to drink gin instead.
11. A seventh grader in Florida recently won her school science fair by proving there are more bacteria in ice machines at fast-food restaurants than in toilet-bowl water.
12. There's no "five-second rule" when it comes to dropping food on the ground. Bacteria need no time at all to contaminate food.
13. The first true toothbrush, consisting of Siberian pig-hair bristles wired into carved cattle-bone handles, was invented in China in 1498. But tooth brushing didn't become routine in the United States until it was enforced on soldiers during World War II.
14. Please don't squeeze the corncob. In 1935, Northern Tissue proudly introduced "splinter-free" toilet paper. Previous toilet paper options included tundra moss for Eskimos, a sponge with salt water for Romans, and -- hopefully splinter-free -- corncobs in the American West.
15. NASA recently spent $23.4 million designing a space-shuttle toilet that would defy zero gravity with suction technology at 850 liters of airflow per minute. That's a lot of money for a toilet that sucks.
16. In 1843, Oliver Wendell Holmes Sr. campaigned for basic sanitation in hospitals. But this clashed with social ideas of the time and met with widespread disdain. Charles Meigs, a prominent American obstetrician, retorted, "Doctors are gentlemen, and gentlemen's hands are clean."
17. Up to a quarter of all women giving birth in European and American hospitals in the 17th through 19th centuries died of puerperal fever, an infection spread by unhygienic nurses and doctors.
18. TV kills! University of Arizona researchers determined that television remotes are the worst carriers of bacteria in hospital rooms, worse even than toilet handles. Remotes spread antibiotic-resistant Staphylococcus, which contributes to the 90,000 annual deaths from infection acquired in hospitals.
19. It is now believed President James Garfield died not from the bullet fired by Charles Guiteau but because the medical team treated the president with manure-stained hands, causing a severe infection that killed him three months later.
20. What on earth made them think manure-stained hands were remotely acceptable to treat anyone?

Read the article here.

Money, money, money

This morning, after my car broke down again for the umpteenth time, I did a quick math about how much I have been spending on my car and in general in the past year. The result was not at all good. I had a rude awakening.

As I was browsing some sites on personal financials, investment, etc, I came across an article about financial independence and since I know my beloved friends are like the White Rabbit , I summarized it for you with the hope that you take some time off to read it and share its wisdom with others:



8 Secrets To Achieving Financial Independence

1.Income Is Not Wealth

Wealth is the part of your net worth (asset minus liabilities) that generates capital gains, income and dividend without your labour.

2. You Must Have Surplus Funds To Invest

The only way to have more money left over at the end of the month is to either increase revenue or decrease costs.

3. Taxes Matter - A Lot

The basic premise is that those with little or no wealth generates a lot of taxable income, while those who end up financially independent generate large unrealized gains in the form of real estate appreciation, unrealized capital gains and profits made through tax-advantaged accounts.

4. True Wealth Is Control Over Your Time

You are truly wealthy when you have complete control over how you spend your day, i.e. by doing what you love. As the blog suggests, you should feel like you are unwrapping a Christmas gift when you turn the key into your office every morning. (AB: I know HL, I know,...This was what you have been nag, I mean telling me...)

5. Grades Have No Correlation With Wealth And Financial Independence

Creative intelligence can push you further in life rather than relying solely on artificial intelligence. According to a study, the grades earned in school have no correlation with economic wealth and success other than in the medical & legal profession. (AB: A penny for your thoughts, legal eagles?)

6. Financial Intelligence Takes A Complimentary Spouse

No matter how successful you are, unless your spouse is equally disciplined, frugal and investment-oriented, your efforts towards a better, financially independent life are going to be like struggling in quicksand. (AB: Bart, looks like we have to put the 24-70mm f2.8 and the 70-200mm f4 L lens on hold, dear.. hehehe)

7. Niche Markets Aren't Glamorous - But They Are Lucrative

Did you know that most of the big money is in industries such as waste management, pizza, clothing stores and candles?! Highly paid professionals tend to be pressured to buy status symbols to convince people that they are successful. As a result, the will put less money into their retirement account. (AB: Makes a lot of sense.)

8. Support Your Productive children, Not The Losers

Parents who want their children to be financially independent should give more to their children who successfully invested and grew their wealth. "You are a damn fool if you give more to the unsuccessful ones because you have successfully managed to effectively turn them into a financial and credit junkie. It is unlikely they will get over their addiction. You become, in effect, a crack dealer providing one more hit". (AB: Ouch. Not that I have any kids yet, but I think this will put more stress on a luckless, underachieving kid.)

The article can be found here in detail.

I'm gonna whip up my calculator and buku 555 now...

Pointless New Year Resolutions

My Pointless New Year Resolutions for 2009 (PNYR):

1. Shed the last 8kg which seemed to have found its final resting place on 'specific' areas;
2. Actually love what I am doing professionally;
3. Start saving for retirement;
4. Rarely skip the gym (and swapping it with the karaoke hub conveniently located next door. Remember PNYR#1);
5. Never to use my bursting vocabulary of profanities again whenever stuck in horrendous traffic jams, especially when trying to carry out PNYR #2;
6. Never to buy another gadget just because it comes in a stylish glossy white finish which I can't take my eyes off from (Must always remind self of PNYR#3. Never to justify such desire with "but I need it for my PNYR#2");
7. Drink less 'teh ais'. Detrimental to teeth (and waistline. Embed PNYR#1 in memory. Wait, what was PNYR#1 again???);
8. Watch less Spongebob except on Sunday mornings when TV3 is not doing reruns (note: carried forward from last year's PNYR);
9. Read intelligent stuff more often and not because it's the only thing you can find on the toilet rack while doing you-know-what ( but how can I get enough time and energy if my life will be mainly focused on PNYR #1 to #8, and oh yeah, the you-know-what too??!);
10. Get married (note: also carried forward from last year's PNYR. Well, these ARE Pointless.New.Year.Resolutions anyway. So, unaccomplished past PNYRs are allowed to be carried forward).

I hope you all have better luck with your PNYRs this year!

Asus oh Asus

I have another new toy to unveil in this sequel to my Retail Therapy. My dear Wallet, I did forewarn you....

TA DAA!!!!

The new Asus F8. 4GB DDR2 RAM and 320 GB HDD. 14.1" WXGA Colorshine & Crystalshine LCD. Glossy white .

I'm in love.

Retail Therapy

A rather unfortunate event has clouded my otherwise beautiful blue skies in the past few weeks. After crying buckets of tears and removing all thoughts brutal and evil, I have now managed to hold my head high up again. But not without a damage to my wallet.

In one vulnerable moment in a twist of fate, I decided to swap my trusted Atom of 2 years:

with this shiny new baby:



It was very hard in letting go, especially when the remarks from my dearest ones were,

"Why a downgrade?!"

Well, here's a typical answer from a woman

"Because it looks nicer and shinier!"

But deep down, only I know the real reason - to fill in the void space in my heart. So wallet, put on your bullet-proof vest and crash helmet. More attacks are coming your way.

Happy bubbles and clear blue skies everybody!

Letting Go

I have this problem with getting too attached to my stuff. Naturally, due to this syndrome of attachment, I became a hoarder. Big time. However, in ushering the new 1430 Hijrah and year 2009, I have decided that it is time to let go. So over the long weekend, I dedicated my time and whatever that's left of my energy to clear out my stuff.



Little that I expect clearing out things will bring back SO MUCH nostalgic memories. I was reunited with my Pandora's Box - it contained among others; surat2 cinta monyet (hehehe..), pictures with long lost friends - some reacquainted through the wonders of Facebook, some lost and untraceable; mementos of friendship; touchingly sweet birthday cards and sensational high school diaries worthy of a season of Gossip Girl material. I was pretty embarassed with exposing those stuff to other people, so at times I had to tell Ning, our helper, to put it aside so I can sort it out by myself. She didn't manage to hide the mix of bemusement and curiousity from me though.



Everytime I came across something that either made me grin uncontrollably or my tearducts flow, I kept telling myself "No, this has to go (coz I don't want anybody else to find it)!"



So among the things which had been sent to the dumpster were:

1) Primary school report cards (goodbye to those infinte As and teacher's pet remarks)

2) High school textbooks (well, since KBSM is now ruled out)

3) SPM reference books (Pelangi, Sasbadi and Delta must've profited a lot from me)

4) Doraemon comics (courtesy of my siblings, REALLY!)

5) Reader's Digest (almost 50 of them)



Now THESE favourite things of mine has found new owners; my dearest cousins Kakak, Dede and Anik:

1) Enid Blyton's ( which explains why I grew up tomboy-ish and adventurous)

2) Sweet Valley High novels (which explains my sister Eliana's high drama)

3) Various fairy tale titles (I had a dream...)

4) An unused piggy bank in the shape of a pink toilet bowl (beats me too. Explains why it is unused by a tomboy. But it's a pretty porcelain piece nonetheless)



To my youngest brother Haziq, I bequeathed upon him:

1) Planet Hollywood game (unused)

2) A set of 2kg Dumbbells (unused. Duhh..)

3) Some old PS2 games (which for some strange reason was hidden behind my shelves. Probably an act of spite from some immature sibling rivalry between him and Eliana when they were younger)

All in all, my boudoir now looks more like a bedroom and less like a museum. All in the spirit of starting a New Year.

Happy New Year all!

HDR, Here I Come!

Here are my first two attempts at HDR (High Dynamic Range) photos. Tengah cuba, try, test, tengok!

Both the images were shot at dusk, at Nazri's Place, Kg. ABC, Tioman Island.

I find the tweaking and editing engrossing, so I guess this will hold up my interest for the time being! Just watch this space and my Flickr for more...

Which lane are you on?

One day, like every other day when driving to work, the jam was stressing me out of my wits. Luckily I had the new camera on me..and I started snapping away. Oh, how I wish I was driving on the opposite direction!

To all you lucky folks out there who doesn't have to go through this 5 days a week, I ENVY YOU!

Oh Bali!

Counting the days to set foot on you again....

Snakes and Ladders

In my current organisation, it has been repeatedly harped that promotion and bonuses will only be granted upon consideration of additional scope and scale of responsibilities, wider contribution to the organisation and excellence in the relevant sphere of reponsibilities. I find myself to be in a strategic position, or some people might call it as lucky, with regard to this.

I have come to believe that on top of these criterias, one element must also be present - being at the right place at the right time, even if you didn't expect it to be. Knowing The Gap in the management's strength can boost your career chart. I've heard people say that success depends on how many people you know in higher management and how well you kiss their a$s. To a certain extent, this is true. But what I truly, deeply believe is that if you do your job honestly, maintain a cordial and necessary PR with your superiors and show them your integrity as a decent, alert and ambitious person (and of course knowing where is The Gap) you will get noticed. Naturally.

Of course, you can't always clam down other people's friggin gobs, unfairly accusing you of brown-nosing. So be mature, and don't jump the gun by doing anything damaging to your reputation. Save that sarcastic - if not profanity-filled reply e-mail in your 'draft' for a few hours, and read it back later. By then you should be able to assess whether your reaction is more personal rather than professional. I normally take a few deep breaths (at times, in God's solace) in order to maintain my sanity and restore my judgment. At the end of the day, trust the person in you and have faith in the Powers Above. It is not easy, so don't complicate it further.

Let's try to stay on our tracks.

Family Ties

Here's a blog dedicated by Pak Lang to, for better or for worse; my dear big (and very 'kecoh' :-)) family.

Thanks Pak Lang, for starting this.

http://amiromar.wordpress.com/

Parents Give Up Youths Under Law Meant for Babies

Blame it on poor economic condition? or just parental irresponsibility?

___________________________________________________________

http://www.nytimes.com/2008/10/03/us/03omaha.html?_r=1&hp=&oref=slogin&pagewanted=all

"In July, Nebraska became the last state to enact a so-called safe-haven law. Such laws permit mothers to leave an infant at a facility with no fear of prosecution. Nationwide, more than 2,000 babies have been turned over since Texas enacted the first such law in 1999, according to the National Safe Haven Alliance in Virginia.

But Nebraska’s version was far broader than all others, protecting not just infants but also children up to age 19."

"The abandonments began on Sept. 1, when a mother left her 14-year-old son in a police station here.

By Sept. 23, two more boys and one girl, ages 11 to 14, had been abandoned in hospitals in Omaha and Lincoln. Then a 15-year-old boy and an 11-year-old girl were left.
The biggest shock to public officials came last week, when a single father walked into an Omaha hospital and surrendered nine of his 10 children, ages 1 to 17, saying that his wife had died and he could no longer cope with the burden of raising them.

In total last month, 15 older children in Nebraska were dropped off by a beleaguered parent or custodial aunt or grandmother who said the children were unmanageable.
Officials have called the abandonments a misuse of a new law that was mainly intended to prevent so-called Dumpster babies — the abandonment of newborns by young, terrified mothers — but instead has been used to hand off out-of-control teenagers or, in the case of the father of 10, to escape financial and personal despair."

Ingat, Jimat, Cermat, Hemat

....wise words imparted on me this Raya by my grandfather while handing out 'duit raya' to me. (I know I'm too old for that, but hey, even my parents got duit raya from him this year! We love you Atok!)

Those exact four words would be my new mantra in achieving financial independence.

Should be. Can be. Can hopefully be. :-)

Well, good luck to me!

Goodbye Ramadhan

Today is the second last day of Ramadhan 1429H. Somehow, it leaves me feeling a bit sentimental. I guess as you grow older, I mean more matured, you have an increasing awareness on time and space issues.

Ramadhan has been a month especially close to my heart since the passing of my beloved great grandmother 2 years ago. We used to have our own routine- waking up at 4 a.m. for sahur together, enjoying her one-of-a-kind teh tarik at break fast, fussing over a matching tudung for her baju raya and changing her money into small notes for the eagerly-awaited duit raya for my little cousins.

The Raya immediately after her passing, I cried inconsolably at her grave. Same goes for the Raya after that. So deep was my attachment to her. But this year, I vowed not to cry. Not because I have decided to push her back, deep inside my memories, but because I have to learn to let go.

I dream of her sometimes. Once she said she missed me. And in that dream, she showed me around her big house and made my favourite drink, her ever-so-special teh tarik.

I hope, this Syawal, I will be able to fulfill my vow and maybe, just maybe, she will come to me again. Insya Allah. Al-Fatihah.